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A review by afrathefish
Before I Let Go by Kennedy Ryan
3.75
Ryan writes emotion with such clarity and such poise, and truly contextualises how a certain scenario would trigger a feeling which would then drive a behaviour. everything makes sense. she too, seems to understand that making people needlessly shitty is honestly just lazy writing, and while some people hold shitty characteristics on account of their upbringing and environment, there are motivators to why people act shittily and fuck up. even in the works of hers i’ve hated, the actions of her characters make sense.
what really took me away was how *human* the book was. while it was escapist, what felt wonderful to read was the fact that the main protagonists were just two adults, acting like adults. there was no stupid third act break up that comes out of nowhere, there’s no immaturity, just honest ways in which adults act and work and the simple ways we simply hurt each other. not only did every character feel fleshed out, but so did every dynamic. the dynamic between not just the main pairing, but their relationship with their kids, their kids relationships with each other, their friendships and outer circles; and how the sum of their circumstances affect the way they weave into each other’s lives. ryan’s grasp of emotion is magnificent; she truly considers how one may feel in any given moment and expresses it in wonderful ways you kind of feel entirely sucked in. every relationship feels like it has purpose, and has significance. things are shown, not told, and again when done well is really good to see.
the exploration of mental illness and all of its ugliness, and how it can actually impact relationships is done so so so fucking well. you see a character building herself back up 2 years after an intense depressive episode, and truly experience the aftermath of her actions during that time. how, when you’re actually in that space, all of your mental capacities get taken up by just trying to make it through that the little energy you have for anything else often becomes destructive and ruinous. you see the complexity of understanding how your actions were shitty and while they were made under the influence of a mental condition, they were still your actions and thus your consequences to handle and manage. it’s done very well. also the way these consequences impair her relationship with her daughter, and seeing the way they reconcile made me realise i may have mother related issues and had me in tears.
it also looks at the reality of comparability, and actually how love isn’t ever enough to sustain something long term. it’s why second chance in this context and dynamic works; it’s clear these two have remained in love, but what good does love do if your incompatibilities and inability to communicate continuously keeps you hurting each other? it’s also really nice how both are only seen reconciling after their issues are dealt with; and dealt with well. also the yearning and the pining and the tension like it WORKED and NO CHEATING WAS INVOLVED.
it was just wonderful in reading just . such a human book. it combined both my love for books exploring the human condition and one about romance that is written the way this one is. it is just very well done.
i may give this four stars bc my usual four stars feel a lot more hard hitting than this. beware, this is no life changer, and for many, it would probably feel like . just fine . and i guess it feels like that for me too. but i’ve been wracking my brain trying to find a good enough reason but find myself empty.
i guess it was just the complexity of thought given in presenting the simplicity of human emotion that did it for me. it’s no life changer but definitely something i’ll be returning to.
what really took me away was how *human* the book was. while it was escapist, what felt wonderful to read was the fact that the main protagonists were just two adults, acting like adults. there was no stupid third act break up that comes out of nowhere, there’s no immaturity, just honest ways in which adults act and work and the simple ways we simply hurt each other. not only did every character feel fleshed out, but so did every dynamic. the dynamic between not just the main pairing, but their relationship with their kids, their kids relationships with each other, their friendships and outer circles; and how the sum of their circumstances affect the way they weave into each other’s lives. ryan’s grasp of emotion is magnificent; she truly considers how one may feel in any given moment and expresses it in wonderful ways you kind of feel entirely sucked in. every relationship feels like it has purpose, and has significance. things are shown, not told, and again when done well is really good to see.
the exploration of mental illness and all of its ugliness, and how it can actually impact relationships is done so so so fucking well. you see a character building herself back up 2 years after an intense depressive episode, and truly experience the aftermath of her actions during that time. how, when you’re actually in that space, all of your mental capacities get taken up by just trying to make it through that the little energy you have for anything else often becomes destructive and ruinous. you see the complexity of understanding how your actions were shitty and while they were made under the influence of a mental condition, they were still your actions and thus your consequences to handle and manage. it’s done very well. also the way these consequences impair her relationship with her daughter, and seeing the way they reconcile made me realise i may have mother related issues and had me in tears.
it also looks at the reality of comparability, and actually how love isn’t ever enough to sustain something long term. it’s why second chance in this context and dynamic works; it’s clear these two have remained in love, but what good does love do if your incompatibilities and inability to communicate continuously keeps you hurting each other? it’s also really nice how both are only seen reconciling after their issues are dealt with; and dealt with well. also the yearning and the pining and the tension like it WORKED and NO CHEATING WAS INVOLVED.
it was just wonderful in reading just . such a human book. it combined both my love for books exploring the human condition and one about romance that is written the way this one is. it is just very well done.
i may give this four stars bc my usual four stars feel a lot more hard hitting than this. beware, this is no life changer, and for many, it would probably feel like . just fine . and i guess it feels like that for me too. but i’ve been wracking my brain trying to find a good enough reason but find myself empty.
i guess it was just the complexity of thought given in presenting the simplicity of human emotion that did it for me. it’s no life changer but definitely something i’ll be returning to.